Is This Meme On?

At least a third of Internet traffic these days---and two-thirds of MySpace---seems to be devoted to "memes," where someone will post a survey with a whole bunch of questions, answer them, and then pass them on in the hopes that you will answer them as well. It's allegedly a way for all your friends to get to know you, but the more of them I get, the more they look like timewasters for people who are in college. I predict another spike in this behavior in fifty years when everyone who's doing this now suddenly retires.

Normally I avoid participating in memes---for one thing, I really don't have time, and for another, they're rarely particularly informative ("6. What are you Wearing Right Now? A. Jeans and a t-shirt"). But the other day a friend of mind sent one out that looked really fun. The gimmick is this: You pick a band that you love and answer the questions only in titles from their songs. For example, my friend chose heavy-metal band Pantera, and in Question 3, "Describe yourself," she answered "Hellbound, Proud to Be Loud, Fucking Hostile," et al.

I couldn't resist, so I caved. Here's the first meme I believe I've ever responded to.

1. Choose a band / artist and answer ONLY in titles of their songs: I choose ? and the Mysterians, who rose to prominence in the early sixties with the great proto-garage anthem... (wait for it...)

2. Are you male or female: 96 Tears

3. Describe Yourself: 96 Tears

4. How do some people feel about you: 96 Tears

5. How do you feel about yourself: 96 Tears

6. How do you feel about ex boyfriends/girlfriends: 96 Tears

7. Describe current boyfriend/girlfriend/crush: 96 Tears

8. Describe where you want to be: 96 Tears

9. How do you feel about your friends: 96 Tears

10. Describe how you live: 96 Tears

11. Describe how you love: 96 Tears

12. What would you ask for if you had just one wish: 96 Tears

13. Share a few words of Wisdom: 96 Tears

14. Now say goodbye: 96 Tears (Extended Remix)



[Afternote: the friend in question---hi, metalchica!---said "I knew you were gonna do 96 Tears!" Which stunned me, because it took me a lot of figuring to get there. I actually really wanted to do some singer with only two real hits---someone like Eddy Grant ("Electric Avenue" and "Romancing the Stone") or Bonnie Tyler ("Total Eclipse of the Heart" and "It's a Heartache"), do the first one a dozen times, and end on the second one. (Or put the second one in the second-to-last position, for a better climax.) But all of these artists---and most one-hit wonders---really do have other songs in their catalog, and it would be disingenuous to pretend, let's say, that you're a Chris deBurgh fan and then answer everything with "Lady in Red" and "Don't Pay the Ferryman." For the integrity of the joke, I wanted someone who literally wrote and performed only two songs, both of which were famous. I couldn't think of any. So that left "96 Tears" the most famous song I'm aware of by a band that was created just to perform the song. Anyway, I'm thrilled to know that my friend knew me better than I know myself. Maybe these memes really do help spread knowledge!]